


Payback

by storiesfortravellers



Category: Anthropomorfic, Cable News Networks, Pundit RPF, Pundit RPF (US)
Genre: Angry Sex, Crack, Humor, M/M, Rivals Working Together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-27
Updated: 2013-01-27
Packaged: 2017-11-27 04:00:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/657813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/storiesfortravellers/pseuds/storiesfortravellers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for oxensiensis' Porn Battle for the prompts: "MSNBC/FoxNews, prank, hate sex, Daily Show"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Payback

They worked together to break in. MSNBC was better at picking locks, but Fox could talk the guards into believing any story they wanted. 

When they finally arrived, they started to set up the camera. 

"I think I should top," Fox said suddenly.

"What? You never like to top."

"It sends the wrong message if I don't top," Fox explained as if it were perfectly logical. 

"Who taught you that? Was it Rupert? Seriously, that is such retrograde thinking. You have the mindset of someone from the Nineteenth Century. Who's stupid. And mean."

"Gee, you don't have a superiority complex at all. Your opinion of me is so objective. It really shows your journalistic integrity," Fox said, taking off his shirt.

"You seriously don't want to make this about journalistic integrity," MSNBC said, unbuckling his belt.

"So self-righteous," grumbled Fox as he finished stripping and pulled himself up on the desk. 

"What's that? You're criticizing me for sticking to the facts? Like, for example, the fact that you're a tool?" The rest of his clothes came off.

"Seriously, it's not fair for you to be on top," Fox said as MSNBC turned the camera on and pointed at the desk before climbing onto the desk next to him. 

"Fine, I'll be an incredibly bossy dominant bottom."

"I don't think so."

"Frotting?"

"... Fine."

They started groping, being sure to stay in the camera's sights, eventually moving so that one of them was fucking the other's thigh's while giving him a handjob.

"The Occupy Movement was the most important expression of the true will of Americans in this century," MSNBC whispered, spurring Fox to grip rougher.

"The Tea Party is a group of patriots who want to bring America back to a great country that actually follows the constitution," Fox said, and MSNBC squeezed angrily, nails digging into Fox's back.

When they were done, they both sat there for a minute breathless. 

Then they sat up and looked right at the camera and said, "Hi, Jon."

They got dressed, pleased with themselves. That night's Daily Show had made them a laughingstock. Again. 

Which means that Jon Stewart is going to get a video of them having sex on the Daily Show desk. So they can spend the next week watching Jon try and awkwardly avoid touching his desk. Making _him_ look ridiculous.

Fox and MSNBC didn't see eye to eye on, well, almost anything. But the one thing they could both agree on is the value of payback.


End file.
